Sarcasm, Eating Disorders, College Life, and everything else.. Oh and for those who hate cursing.. Fuck you. Just kidding.. But seriously.

Sep 25, 2010

Thin Bones

The starve bone's connected the thin bone.
And the thin bone's connected to me. ;)

I wieghed myslef this morning and guess what?!?!?!
I lost 8lbs these last couple weeks!
YES YES YES YES YES! I decided that since my hip bones were making a lovely return and my ribs were starting to show that I should get on the scale of death.

This loss is good but I want more.. I always want more... I know that once I hit 120 I'll be great, and 115 I'll be lovely but imagine me at 95! At 95 pounds I'll be perfect! I'll have mastered control, food will be nothing to me. I'll look good in everything!

I'm gonna get to october 21st and i'll be 120...better yet 115. but by the new year I WILL be 115 and no one can stop me.

I'm gonna try to water fast soon. I can't untill after monday because I have a statistics test. I want to beat my water fast record of 11 days and go for 20 days!
Unfortunately I'm going to have to eat this weekend to get this stupid studying done but I have A's in all my classes so i'm not too worried. :)
I've been monster mashing all weekend... yum yum yum ;) Well i gtg study. love you all!

Where did my followers go? I feel so alone now :(

Sep 23, 2010

I'm like Fuck this shit BEOTCH.

Sorry I've kinda sucked at postin but I have a lame fuckin test on monday :(
I've been starving so well. I usually eat 50 cals till I about 4pm, and then maybe 100-400 depending on whether tyler is watching me. 
Today I haven't eaten a thing! HAHAHA fuck you fat!
 If fat was a person I'd be the one standing over it's bloody scared bruised body saying 
"FUCK YOU I run this town bitch! "
I didn't get the job I wanted but fuck it. 
Yes I'm in a "fuck" mood so if you are curse sensitive, go fuck your couch. lmao
Yea well I finally have a routine group of friends at school... one is a really cool fit chick who has an awesome attitude, loves sarcasm and is just as much of a bitch as me about some things lmao, the other chick is laid back and the tattoo'd rocker girl. I adore them both! 

I knew me and the first girl would be immediate friends when we were sitting next to each other and I saw some girl's cellulite thighs that literally made me gag. She was like "what's wrong" and I told her "I'm a super bitch for saying this, but that girl across the row has the most disgusting leg cellulite ever." and she looked and nearly threw up too. She was saying how much she hates cellulite and fat and loves working out. (we're a match made in heaven!lol)
Yes I have cellulite too, but dear god! This girl had cellulite dips in her thigh that could probably hold a golf ball! She was wearing tiny little shorts! How can you do that!?! Gah I have very unnoticeable cellulite and I could never wear short shorts! 

I just guzzled down a salt water flush mixture so yea...
I wanna skip school tomorrow
I haven't worked out enough to mention so I'm probably going to tomorrow...
FML I'm stressed out, and I've missed you all! You girls are the most precious little monsters.

I'm ending my evening with about 130 liquid calories...  
Stay Strong, Stay beautiful, and STAY BAD!

Sep 21, 2010

And the Winner is...

 Thinner Talk and then Winner Talk!
I don't know if all you lovely little monsters know my ED history but I'll give you a brief glimpse:
I was a pretty skinny girl growing up, then hit puberty over night...
(seriously, flat chest to 32B in one summer!)
I could not understand that I had to wear bigger clothes, I didn't want the changes that fast! 
So many girls were tiny and perfect.. I started hating my body more than I usually did.
Became anorexic, then had body/mental breakdown was in IP, then released & recovered. 
Last November EDNOS crept in. I know I'm not bulimic because I don't fit it. 
I purge like once a month. In June it was everyday. I'd rather starve, 
and lately I'm thinking it's drifting from EDNOS into anorexia again. 
Slowly but it's feeling that way. 
I don't know what to think.
I don't know what to feel

Last nights dinner:
 I had a jello, and a rice cake and water.. 
The calories yesterday didn't even hit 200 calories, and I didn't suffer at all either.
Then woke up feeling fine. Had a half of a yogurt (50), Half a rice cake (25)
Sociology class, then drank most of a tall skinny iced latte (50)
And a jello (10)
I'll  have a rice cake for dinner..or a jello. I worked out for an hour like a maniac!

-The Snogging Snack Time Winner IS!!-
(Stiletto roll!!!)

Yes I've seductively, secretly, obnoxiously,
loudly, mysteriously, wrongly, amazingly, 
exquitely, passionately, intoxicatingly, rudely,
lovingly, selfishly, wonderfully, spontaneously, 
magically, and memorably KISSED 30 GUYS!

-Since you snagged my snog snack secret (try saying that five times fast!)
  I'll answer your question:

How many men have I Slept with/done the Monster Mash with? ;)
The answer is 5!
(Which just so happens to be my lucky number too!)

p.s- This was fun :) we should do this like once a week!
My size seven jeans are loosening already!
I really appreciate all of you.
You're my besties!

Sep 20, 2010

Snogging Snack Time

Reader Responses:
Posie-Hey welcome to the life of me! I'm glad you like it! 
Lost in Space- I am happy (usually
Anna-Dreams suck like that sometimes.. I know I have them cause I think tyler is too good for me and we BOTH had to cheat to be together..ummm yea lol..
Amy- I'm glad you aren't sick of hearing about him/us.. lol 
B-May-I've missed you too!! xoxox!
Acka-I am following you now :) thanks for being a reader sweetie!
Mich- Winter does have the best clothes! BY FAR!
Dirty Diana-I mean billie jeanThings are going well for now! I love your blog and ANY fan of MJ is a personal hero to start with! lmao. Thank you for noticing that I actually do read blogs! I really love you little monsters! It means a lot and a half when you girlies leave me comments! xoxoxoxo

Snack Time!  
(the time where I let you little monsters feast on my juicy little stories from my eat up! after all they are ZERO calories!)

-When I was a sophomore in high school we got two GORGEOUS foreign exchange student boys from Germany who every girl in school wanted! We ended up spending every day together hanging out... After about a month I started snogging the hot Jock like blond. (6'3'' 8pack abs) then the next weekend the Romantic Mysterious Brunette (6'4'' and 8pack) came over and confessed his feelings for me on Christmas ever and we spent two hours kissing in the light of the fireplace. BTW they were best friends. My monster habits started out young. Every girl in the district wanted to be my best friend that year because I snogged the hottest men to EVER go to our school. (true story!)

-I've written down the name (if i remember!) the date, and place of EVERY guy I've ever kissed...If you can guess the amount right I'll answer ANY question you want!!
Hint: over fifteen, but less than fifty ;)

 Today-Yesterday-Life-Food-Blah Blah Blah
  • under 100 cals today!
  • 600 yesterday (fat fkn whale!)
  • Worked out today and burned 200 cals (still a fat whale..but a toned fat whale..)
  • Tyler is still perfect
  • I was walking behind a girl today who had the best body..long skinny legs. fkk her! lol
  • I've decided to kick my fat ass into shape and make the new goal date my homecomming which is Oct.21
 Tonight I'm going to avoid eating.. I really don't want to bust past 250cal today at all! I'm gonna do my homework (ug) take a monster bath, do my nails and monster mash with my man ;) 
I can feel my body eating up the nasty fat cells with every growl of my stomach! victory will be mine! I will be thin!  Just in time for winter...