Well it's been interesting to say the least..
-I woke up feeling great!
-Peed and took measurements.
-Drank 1 pint of ice cold water with 1/2tsp of cayenne pepper with my diet pill.
-Took multivitamins, and then drank a cup of coffee with splenda.
-After about an hour I felt nauseous and tummy sick.
So I don't know why i felt like that it's a new fasting symptom to me but...it was the morning.
And yea. So... ANYWAYS
-I didn't go to the gym. Tyler is sick and I wanted to rush home to see him and take care of him.
I hate being home..it is filled with food.
So much temptation!
I had an argument with Ana on my walk home:
Me- "You know..Tyler isn't home yet I could eat and then purge before he got home."
Ana-"Wow not only are you willing to be fat, but lie to Tyler."
Me- "Yeah I know but I'm hungry Ana! And It's not like anyone would know."
Ana-"I would know. You can't just leave me to hang w/ Mia. You belong to me!"
Me- "Ok..What about one strawberry? Pretty Please!"
Ana- "No! it'll ruin all you worked for. You can go w/out food forever! You're strong!"
Me-"I love you Ana, Ok well I'll just grab my powerade zero instead."
Ana- "Good girl! I'm never leaving you, I'm always here. I understand you."
(Isn't it sad that some of my most empowering conversations come from Ana,the little fairy in my brain.
She tells me that she understands me, and doesn't judge.She told me in my dreams that she makes me happier.She said when I'm starving, it's her reminding me how good food is and to stop taking it for granted. Ana told me that when my nails turn blue and I'm shivering cold that I need to be grateful because it brings me closer to Tyler because I cuddle closer to him at night. She says she keeps me safe and loves me. I love her too in a really sick way.)
Total Loss From Days 1-2
Hips: -0cm <- FAIL!
Total Loss= 1.4cm or 0.6inches