I'm OCD and it requires a lot of energy to do regular activities because
I get so fkn stupid over them..
I've gotten less than 4 hours of sleep each night for the past two weeks.
Little to no food.It's draining me,
People ask me what do I want out of all of this.
All the pain, stress, starving, OCD..
I'll tell you. This. Is. What. I. Want.
I want skin on my bones.
I want him on my skin.
I want a smile on his face.
I want me on his mind.
I want all A's.
I want to be friends with the scale.
I want to be tiny.
I want everything to be perfect.
I want to be envied, hated, loved, noticed but left alone.
Want is a lie.
Want is a disguise I tell people.
Want is really Need.
-I'm gonna starve.
-I will do a tips page
-I need help.. I don't want it.
-I'm really overwhelmed....
to be like
I NEED TO BE SKINNY GODDAMNITT! DOESN'T ANYONE UNDER$TAND ME! MY WHOLE WORLD HURTS BECAUSE I'M FAT.