Today... and how to freak out a dental assistant

Woke up. Had an odd dream about Christian Bale...He was my boss (which doesn't make any sense since I don't have a job.)

Last night my husband was being an asshole which is common.
So I went for a late night run because I felt fat and pissed off. I ran again this morning.

No food for today which is perfect because buying food in Virginia is like raping a nun its so depressing... I'm used to the awesomeness of Oregon's no sales tax and fresh farmers markets.

Today they are working on my latest fucked up tooth, and I have quite the history of fucking up my teeth. Fortunately enough I chipped one of the side front teeth a few months back when I was wasted.

I was hungrier than an Ethiopian child at the moment and bit into a massive and delicious popcorn ball.

But sometimes children food will bite you back. So now there is a noticeable chip in my tooth.

Despite my love with the dentist I'm a bit hesitant to go again because last time I went and had X-rays the dental assistant stuck her finger in my mouth to pull out the rubber stopper and I unintentionally sucked on her finger.

I sucked on her finger long enough to create an misty stink of awkwardness in the room.

I wanna to scream "I'm not a lesbo!" But I'm sure that would have just freaked her out.

I love awkward moments like these though...Secretly I hope its on their mind enough that at their therapy session next week I'm a highlight.